*Chapter 43 has been posted*

I hate it when I get blocked. All my words just leave me. It's like I can't even form sentences. All I can do is sit there and stare at flickering images on the screen... or abstract sounds from the stereo. I'm useless when words leave me. I am nothing but a piece of trash wanting the wind to have its way with her...

Deep in the hollow of my heart I know words are useless, but they're mine and they're all I've ever done well. So forgive me if I get fragile when they leave... it's all I can do to hold on until they come back...

cry on demand... how did you learn to? cry on demand... why would you want to? cry on demand... teach me if you want to... cry on demand... you know you don't have to, I just close my eyes and think of you...