Happy Saturday to ye.

I am out of sorts. I've had things rolling through my head. Things I really shouldn't think of at 2am. Things that make me sort of sob into the pillow and fall asleep with tear misted eyes....

I am so very lonely, it's not even funny.

Anyway, I know you didn't come here to hear me whine... so... next question...

From the lovely Person who Does not Have a Diary to reference:

OK, bluestarhalo...If you had the Omega 13ish chance to go back in time and alter a single mistake, would you, what would it be and why?

Gah. What is it with you people? Making me get all souly and thoughtful...

Okay, I don't know if this is a mistake per se, but it is something I'd like to change. Things happened to me when I was a child that I would rather not have experienced, you know what I mean? (Some of you will understand this.) Anyway, I would rather have had strength of character back then and then said something about it. Maybe it would have stopped before it became the most important memory of my young life; the memory I am never without, even now. I don't know. Maybe my life would be different now, maybe I'd be different now. I try not to play guessing games with the past because you can only drive yourself mad that way.

Some mistakes are worth making after all.. although this one wasn't. Definitely not. And since it was done to me and not by me I guess it's all academic anyway.

I might want to also go back and tell my young 13 year old self that she had value and that she wasn't worthless or ugly or any of those other things that 13 year old girls think. That could be something to correct.

Sometimes the wounds that are self-inflicted and invisible are the ones that take the longest to heal...

Well, I'm just a bundle of joy, aren't I?